They just wanted to have fun. Relax. Snuggle. And get some great couple shots- not engagement shots, but shots celebrating their relationship. Ashley and Melissa grabbed Kristin of Kristin La Voie Photography and headed to a paintball field.

“Ashley and I first met our freshman year of college at an event with mutual friends, but we were both with other people so nothing really came of it. It wasn’t until two years later when we were at a friend’s birthday party that the sparks and butterflies really started. However, despite poking and prodding from her friends, Ashley was just too shy to say anything to me, and I was too intimidated by her to say anything.

When I was invited a few months later to a Halloween party that Ashley was going to be at, I knew I had to be there. I knew it was going to be the last chance I’d get to tell her how I really felt, and see if we had a chance. It was going to be my last chance because I was going to be moving to Florida in a week. I figured I had nothing to lose, if she shot me down I was leaving anyway, and if she felt the same way I did, then I finally had a chance to be with her.

Luckily, she felt the same way I did and even though I was moving, as Ashley put it “a million miles away”, we both wanted a chance to make this work after waiting so long. So we took things slow and after a million text messages, Skype calls, insane cell phone bills and an amazing surprise graduation gift for Ashley, we fell in love and knew we’d make it work no matter what.”

With the weather just turning over to Spring, a beach wedding was just what I wanted to show. Bright colors, gorgeous sand couple shots and even a starfish tattoo all were captured by Cassie Leah Photography.

From the couple: Our wedding was October 22, 2011 on a beautiful day in Ponte Vedra Beach, FL. We choose the option of doing a beach house wedding. In this event, we had to coordinate all the vendors and account for all expenses, because this was not an all inclusive venue. The benefit from this was that we had complete control over every detail and our entire bridal party, including our parents could stay here and not have to worry about traveling. The disadvantage was that we had to strategically plan everything imaginable and purchase or rent everything individually. All in all, the planning went well and on the day of our event, it was nearly flawless! The weather, the atmosphere and the day couldn’t have been more perfect. We were expecting about 100 guests from all over the states from Colorado and New Mexico to New York and New Jersey.

(more…)

I submitted my So You’re EnGAYged blogger application on January 22, 2011 and my first blog went live on March 21.  It is crazy that almost 8 months have gone by since I started detailing my wedding plans here.  And now, I am posting for the last time.  Sad times.

But, what has not been a sad time is connecting with all of you and getting your advice from what should go in our water glasses to questions of tradition and etiquette.  It was also cool to get married; for real and all kinds of legal.

Well, before I get to the my wedding planning/blogging experience precis, I thought I would share some honeymoon pictures and thoughts.

We went to Aruba for our honeymoon and it was amazing.  We had a room right on the beach and there was a hammock right outside of our room.  The water was warm and the sun was warmer.   It was the perfect type of vacation after months of stressful planning.

Dave of course needs a good book to read when traveling, and Betty White’s bio did the trick!

This is taken from the lounge chair right outside our room.  Dave does have a good eye for pictures!

If you remember my post about our Long Island Thunderstorm, this is the handmade cabana outfit my childhood neighbor made us.  Dave has a coordinating  one!

One of the coolest things about Aruba is that the sun sets at approximately the same time every day of the year, right around 6:30 p.m.  This was one of the best parts of the trip;  grabbing a cool drink and watching the sun set.

The north side of the island is very rocky and has a desert feel.  We went horse back riding along this area and along the beach.  It was, for sure, a highlight of the trip. Although the trotting does damage a boy in a particular way that lingers.

Yes, yes, the perfunctory write-in-the-sand-to-mark-the-occasion picture.  But, hey, when in Rome, or whatever.

When we got home from the honeymoon, the last thing we promised ourselves is that we would go out to a nice dinner to bookend the whole experience.  This was nice, because we had enough time away from the stress of it all to really reflect on the whole experience. Dave looks pretty hot, and relaxed, right?

 

My Final Thoughts

To change the tone here a little bit, I wanted to talk about some more serious final thoughts about our wedding and marriage.

First, one thing I never did talk about here, was right before I started blogging, we lost our dog, Mandy.  It was sudden, and we planned to have her in the wedding in some way.  She was there though, in both spirit and in picture.  Often when I wrote blogs here I did open up about my feelings on a variety of issues, but understood that people really wanted to hear about things connected to the wedding planning process.  But since I feel a bit more connected to you all now, I thought I would share a tribute video we made for her.  I think in part I did not talk about her because of how much it still really hurts to not have her in our lives.

Our Mandy Baby

Beyond the fact that I LOVE this picture, I also think it sums up all of our reasons for having our wedding: to be surrounded by the ones we love.  Save for one nephew, this is the totality of both of our families.  I am not sure I can fully appreciate nor articulate what it meant to us to be within and around so much love, and not just for that day.

 

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

But the reality is that we are now onto the married part of the wedding planning.  I read/heard the following the other day that went something like “people should put more thought and planning into their marriage than their wedding day.”  This is so true.  Because it really is just one day.  One amazing, beautiful day, but still, just 6 or so concentrated hours.  It is the happily-ever-after part that I think people forget to worry about.  And it ain’t easy, for sure.

Dave and I are lucky that we found each other and we have worked on our marriage, and settled into our life, well before we got married.   I am sure marriage advice abounds, but if I could offer one, succinct thing, it would be this: find the reason why you fell in love, and remember that in times when your present feelings of love might be otherwise.  Nothing about the pairing of two people is easy.  As a breed we tend to be selfish and unable to recognize another person’s reality.  And while the idea of two people spending the rest of their life together is beautiful  in the abstract, people have to be more practical  in the specific to make it work.

What I think the below picture illustrates is what I think makes love and life work.  To steal a scene from Love! Valoure! Compassion!:  (said by Bobby, who is blind in the movie, from the back seat of Perry and Aurthur’s car) “I think…you love each other very much. I think you will stick it out, whatever. I think right now you’re holding hands. I think that when Perry has to take his hand from yours, Arthur, to steer in traffic, he puts it back in yours as soon as he can. I think this is how you always drive. I think…this is how you go through life.”

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

So, I bid you ado, from this wedding planning journey, now onto our life fulfilling one.  If you care, please follow me at My Parent’s Son, my blog I post to from time to time. You can also follow me on Twitter:   http://twitter.com/MichaelMancini5

It has been what I can only classify as a pleasure to spend some time with you all.

Thank you.

 

The details…I tell you, this part of planning the wedding really flipped my switch, if you get what I mean.  I thought I would hate this part, but I kind of loved talking about all the little stuff.

First, the candy bar.  Instead of buying favors, we thought it would be cool to do a candy bar, plus it also worked as a pop of color.  We had a huge martini glass that had yellow and green ribbons for tying up the bag.  On the bag we put stickers that we had made of our monogram from our Save the Dates cards.  But I am pretty sure no one left with any bags of candy, because people were really chowing down on the candy at the wedding.

 

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Yes they do make orange licorice, who knew?!?  I guess they tasted good, we never got to try!

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

The wonderfully nostalgic tags were made by our wedding planner Kate from Lovewell Design.  She also surprised us with these cute straws which she put at the bar.

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Another detail of the wedding was a DIY photo booth.  The hotel had an old phone closet that has been turned into a toy closet.   So Dave and I thought it would be fun to set up our MacBook so people can go in the closet and take pictures or videos.  And to model it after our save the dates, we had a dry erase board so people could write us notes for the pic.  Below is the sign we made to denote the photo booth and below the below is some amazing photos from our friends and family.

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Clearly these are our photogs from Calypso Rae Photography.

These are our Lesbians and our friend Chris…Sue, in the middle, is 9 months pregnant here, and looking fine!!  For those of you who have read my blog posts from the start you will get the reference.

These are our friends Mike and Dawn.  I grew up with them both, and they ended up marrying each other.  I just love the naturalness of this pic.  Plus their son was just on the Martha Stewart Show!

And these are our Asians (clearly we like to label our friends!)  I may or may not have a crush on the boy in the pic…but don’t tell anyone, okay?  She is pretty darn hot, too!

And here Dave is with his sister…if you notice, he is no longer wearing his shirt and tie…yes, he did decide to change into his PJs at the end of the night, but changed right back before I saw him!!

And then, our escort cards, hand printed by our friend Chris, pictured above with our lesbians…amazing, right?

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

 

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

As you may have deduced, our table markers were Gay Icons.  This was Dave’s idea, and I just love it.  What we found great was people chatting during cocktail hour about whose table they were at; many were mad that they were not at Betty White’s table…she is even popular in picture form!!

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Of course, our table was the Judy Garland table…I mean…there is no other choice! Our center pieces, and a 25 foot banister garland, was by Flowers Down Under.  She was amazing, she kept it clean and stylish.

 

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

 

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

Photo by Calypso Rae Photography

So this is my penultimate blog post!  I can’t believe it.  The next blog post will be a retrospective of this whole process, plus some honeymoon pics!